Smartphone romance is cool, but don’t look for happy endings

The dopamine loop’s the same as teenagers, with added risks: anxiety, low self-esteem, fake news, fatigue, insomnia, depression, loneliness.  

By Abhish K Bose

At 86, Nottamkandath Padinjakkara Vilasini Amma from Shornur, Palakkad, never imagined she would befriend a smartphone. She began using one only in 2020 after COVID-19 shut down temple gatherings.

“At first it was just for calls and OTPs for the bank,” she says. With her grandchildren’s help, she learned WhatsApp, Facebook, and YouTube. The screen that once seemed alien now streams live Kathakali from Guruvayur, Sopana Sangeetham from temple courtyards, and ulsavam (temple festival) updates from across Palakkad.  

Before the pandemic, television was her only window to the world. Now, social media brings real-time news, bhajans from her childhood, and video calls with great-grandchildren in Bengaluru and Dubai. “I’ve found old friends from my village. I see their children’s weddings. I don’t feel left behind,” she says. The digital shift, she insists, has kept her mind alert, her days full, and her sense of independence intact. 

Vilasini Amma’s story shows how technology can expand an elder’s world when mobility shrinks. For her, the smartphone is a bridge.  For thousands of others in Kerala, it has become a tether.

However, this romance with social media does not always have happy outcomes.

The same tools that reconnect Vilasini Amma to her friends and kith and kin are also driving a quiet health crisis among the state’s elderly, a 2023 study warned. It is a conclusion that many clinicians today are endorsing.  

Consultant Clinical Psychologist Aswathi Prasad’s June 2023 study, ‘Social Media Dependency and Facebook Usage Among Older Adults in Kerala’, surveyed 210 seniors aged 60-82 across Thiruvananthapuram, Ernakulam, and Kozhikode. The findings overturn the stereotype of elders as reluctant users.  

A staggering 88.2% reported spending over three hours daily on social media, with 47.6% on Facebook alone. Nearly half — 48% — had more than 400 Facebook friends, signalling hyper-connectivity rather than passive scrolling.  

The pattern wasn’t uniform. “Males and urban respondents showed higher addiction scores, and South Kerala reported 23% higher dependency than North Kerala,” Prasad says. Men, the data showed, used platforms not just for family contact but for peer validation and identity reinforcement. Urban access to fast internet and smartphones widened the gap.  

“Our data suggests high digital literacy, yes, but also a tendency toward over-participation,” Prasad noted. “The phone fills a void left by migration, retirement, and bereavement. But the dose matters,” he added.

When Connection Becomes Compulsion

Clinicians across Kerala are seeing the fallout. The symptoms repeat: poor sleep, daytime fatigue, irritability, anxiety, and a paradoxical deepening of loneliness as face-to-face interaction drops.  

Dr. Sudhir Kumar, an honorary consultant with the Alzheimer’s and

Related Disorders Society of India (ARDSI), Kottayam, flags another risk: fraud. “Older adults are soft targets for financial scams, fake health cures, and emotional manipulation on social media. We need digital safety modules in every geriatric check-up,” he says. A non-judgmental approach is key, he adds, because shame stops many from reporting losses.  

Dr. PN Suresh Kumar, Professor of Psychiatry in Kozhikode, frames it as a clinical trade-off. “For elders with mobility issues or after a spouse’s death, social media is a lifeline. It cuts isolation and gives them global family access. But excess use triggers inferiority, poor self-esteem, and anxiety. The constant comparison, the fake news, the fear of missing out — it’s real,” he says.  

He has seen working memory slip in patients who scroll late into the night. “Sleep disruption hits daytime functioning. Addictions don’t need a substance. Behavioural addictions show the same withdrawal, craving, and loss of control.”  

Dr. Sivakumar P Thankaraju, Professor of Geriatric Psychiatry at NIMHANS, Bengaluru, agrees. “We’re diagnosing headache, emotional dysregulation, and depressive symptoms linked directly to 4–5 hours of daily use. Physical activity drops, real conversations drop, and the brain pays the price.”  

The Kerala context makes intervention tricky. High literacy and deep diaspora ties mean social media isn’t ‘entertainment’ — it’s family. “When your son is in Toronto, Facebook isn’t a hobby. It’s how you see your grandchild,” Prasad says. That emotional load fuels compulsive checking and distress when replies are delayed.  

The way out: guidelines, not bans

None of the experts advocates digital abstinence. They prescribe boundaries.  

“Set a clear time frame. Use app timers. No phone 90 minutes before bed,” says Dr. Suresh Kumar. Dr. Sivakumar adds: “…replace, don’t just remove. Yoga, walking groups, cognitive stimulation, temple committees, library hours — the brain needs alternative rewards.”  

ARDSI’s Dr. Sudhir Kumar wants public campaigns on cyber hygiene for seniors, much like pension fraud alerts. “Teach them to spot a fake profile, a UPI scam, a miracle drug ad. And families must model it — don’t gift a phone and vanish.”  

Prasad’s study recommends “diaspora-inclusive interventions”. Families abroad should agree on call schedules, so elders aren’t left refreshing feeds all day. Offline support — neighbours, ward-level ayalkoottams (senior citizen clubs) — must be revived as genuine alternatives, not afterthoughts.  

“Age-friendly environments are the real prevention,” Dr. Sivakumar says. “If the park is safe, if the library has large-print books, if the community hall runs bhajan evenings, the phone becomes a tool again, not a trap.”

Kerala’s elderly are not digital immigrants anymore. They are digital citizens, navigating the same dopamine loops as teenagers, but with added risks of fraud, insomnia, and late-life depression.  

Yet, the answer isn’t fear. It’s the design of habits, homes, and public spaces that give elders somewhere to look up from the screen.  

Back in Shornur, Vilasini Amma has her own rule. An alarm rings at 8 pm. “That’s when I stop,” she laughs. “The phone should serve me, not the other way round.”  For a state ageing faster than any other in India, that might be the wisest of notifications.  

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Abhish K Bose is a journalist with 18 years of experience.  He was a staffer at The Times of India’ and the ‘Deccan Chronicle-Asian Age. He has also contributed to ‘Frontline’ magazine and several websites, both in India and abroad. The article was first published in Panthi.in and can be accessed at https://panthi.in/social-media-addiction-elderly-kerala/)